5 Items the Government Should Subsidize To Save You Money

1. The Hoveround. Tired of paying for tennis courts to play on until you have dead tennis balls for the bottom of your walker? Tom Kruse has the answer. Glide down stairs and up escalators with ease. The government already subsidizes the commercials so why not the product?

2. Pay Phones. Bored of paying for complicated phone plans, even if they have rollover minutes? In order to get people in commercial zones where they are more likely to buy American cars, the government should subsidize phone booths.

3. Taxes. Liberals like to raise taxes and subsidize stuff. Now they can do both.

4. Sand. Our country is great, because of all of us hard-working Americans. If the government doesn't dump ten pounds of sand in front of our door once a month, what will make us continue the American tradition?

5. Rubik's Cubes. This one would save you SOOOO much money. Smart people can become smarter, and stupid people can use these (see below) and feel better about themselves.

Cheers,
Andre