Jombo's Tuesday Question

It there's a blog, and no one reads it, does it actually exist?

Sorry

Sorry Andre and Jombo haven't written anything for a while, but no one reads this blog anyway, so its no big deal. 

I Am Eskimo

Backed when I lived in Nunavut, I was addicted to Dubstep. This was like the soundtrack of my 2007.

Jombo's Tuesday Question

If a tree falls in the forest, how will it affect the economy of Pakistan?

10 Reasons Why It Sucks To Work At A Carnival

During the recession, I had to work some odd jobs to provide for my wife, ex-wives, and children. I thought working at the Spokane carnival would be fun. It wasn't. Here's 10 reasons why:

1. You run the risk of being asked for a centipede as the balloon guy.
2. You might be on security when the ferris wheel falls over.
3. Long hours.
4. It doesn't pay.
5. You have to survive on flavored air.
6. You have to differentiate keys at the lost and found.
7. You have to transport large stuffed animals from one booth to another.
8. Bored grandparents tell you stories of World War I while their kids shoot dinasour-shaped-targets with water guns for prizes made in China.
9. Blowing up giant blow-up slides manually.
10. Fathoming that slip and slides still exist.

Andre

Jesus Wins Waterskiing Title

My divorce lawyer forwarded this article to me over the winter. Check it out.

"For the 1989th consecutive year, Jesus H. Christ of Bethlehem dominated the field at the World Barefoot Waterskiing Championships, held annually in Kenosha, Wisconsin.Christ swept all eight events, earning gold medals in all racing and freestyle categories.

“You know, someone here today asked me how this stacks up against the other 1,988 barefoot waterskiing titles I’ve won,” said Christ, as he unzipped his wetsuit and enjoyed a cold beer in front of an adoring crowd.“I definitely have to say that this one was the sweetest.No doubt.I’ll never get sick of this feeling.”

Read the rest at: http://www.sportspickle.com/news/306/jesus-wins-1989th-consecutive-barefoot-waterskiing-title

Andre

Jombo's Story: Part 2

When I first came to America, my heart was full of immigrant excitement, my lungs inflated by American dreams and my blood saturated with Russian radiation poisoning. However, I quickly learned that America was no land of milk and honey. I was surrounded by low-paying jobs, bloodthirsty criminals, and people speaking a language I could not understand. I was forced to support myself through the subsistence-farming methods of my forefathers, living off of carrots that I grew in sidewalk cracks. It was a difficult life, and I grew bitter and resentful. I took to wandering the streets, begging for spare change and cilantro to  garnish my carrots. My only solace was the novel I worked on each night. This is its second chapter.

Album Review: Will Rap For Food

Just got back from bowling at my Church... man my middle three fingers are killing me. Normally I wouldn't play, but my Church has an old juke box filled with some great rap music. Reminds me of when me and the guys used to rap in the alleys when we were still pin boys. Anyhow, one of the artists I picked up from the jukebox is Cunnin'Lynguists. The ensemble is based in Atlanta and is made up of producer/rappers Kno and Deacon. Their rapping, production, and ability to choose inappropriate band names is alway solid, and a mix of both short and long classics makes Will Rap For Food their best album. If you like, you should definitely also check out A Piece of Strange, another consensus favorite.

Album: Will Rap For Food
Artist: Cunnin'Lynguists
Genre: Rap
Released: 2001
Best Part: Consistency
Worst Part: Hole in the center of the disc is nearly too small to work
Where to Buy: (9 bux) http://www.amazon.com/Will-Rap-For-Food/dp/B000QZVF4Y (or maybe you would prefer getting it for $300 @ http://www.amazon.com/Will-Rap-Food-Cunninlynguists/dp/B00070Q8GI
Best Song: Half Animal

Other Good Songs: Lynguistics, Thugged Out Since Cub Scouts

The Christian Rapper, Braille, is featured on this album. Check out his stuff. 

OVERALL RATING: OOOOOOOOOO

For some info on the rating scale and other stuff about album reviews, click here.

Cheers,
Andre

Andre's Thursday Statistic: Most Popular Color

Today is the anniversary of the first color so our sister site, Google, cleverly changed the logo on their homepage so that each letter had color. This got me thinking about color, what it means and why some are preferred to others. After browsing around on the internet, I found this very professionally drawn statistic which I thought you guys might enjoy...

Jombo's Story: Part 1

When the elephants can't sleep because of acid reflux, I like to read them stories. This is one of them.

By the way, DONT CLICK ON THIS LINK.

Deer Pictures

Jombo and I have been getting a lot of complaints lately.  People are saying that their aren't enough pictures of deer on the bottom of the page. We are terribly sorry, but unfortunately our server cannot support more than one picture of deer at a time. If you want to view more, I suggest visiting www.deer.gov/

Andre

Album Review: Nobody's Story

Hey it's Andre again. Before I got into scrap bookin', Yelnatz and I used to go to rap concerts around Spokane a lot. Hey it isn't a great scene, but at least it's something. Anyway, one time we saw Incise and we were hooked. He always has great production, but he has the rap skills to back it up as well. He just released Daily Methods back in 20&10, and I was going to review that, but in my opinion this album remains his best, and deserves more notice.

Album: Nobody's Story
Artist: Incise
Genre: Rap
Sounds Like: I don't know... what do you think?
Released: 2008
Best Part: Chilaxability; Production
Worst Part: Some songs sound similar to me.
Where to Buy (For Only 8 cents a song!): http://greatmp3list.com/music/50499_Incise/228936250_Nobody_s_Story/
Best Song: Scorpion Tail

Other Good Songs: So Beautiful, Your Soul, and just about everything else

OVERALL RATING: OOOOOOOOOO

For some info on the rating scale and other stuff about album reviews, click here.

What genres do you want to see reviewed/talked about in the future??? 

Ten Ways to Annoy Frozen Yogurt Store Employees

1. Fill a cup with just cereal then ask for milk.
2. Let the machines run for a few seconds because you need to "warm them up."
3. Complain that they don't have raisins.
4. Loiter.
5. Solicit.
6. Perform voodoo rituals with the crushed Oreos.
7. Stick your tongue under the yogurt dispenser because they won't give you free samples.
8. Talk to them about Nascar.
9. Haggle.
10. Walk into the store with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Ask for toppings.

Andre & Jombo

Jombo's Tuesday Question

Going back to an earlier post... If you take all the stickers off a Rubik's Cube, can you solve it?

5 Items the Government Should Subsidize To Save You Money

1. The Hoveround. Tired of paying for tennis courts to play on until you have dead tennis balls for the bottom of your walker? Tom Kruse has the answer. Glide down stairs and up escalators with ease. The government already subsidizes the commercials so why not the product?

2. Pay Phones. Bored of paying for complicated phone plans, even if they have rollover minutes? In order to get people in commercial zones where they are more likely to buy American cars, the government should subsidize phone booths.

3. Taxes. Liberals like to raise taxes and subsidize stuff. Now they can do both.

4. Sand. Our country is great, because of all of us hard-working Americans. If the government doesn't dump ten pounds of sand in front of our door once a month, what will make us continue the American tradition?

5. Rubik's Cubes. This one would save you SOOOO much money. Smart people can become smarter, and stupid people can use these (see below) and feel better about themselves.

Cheers,
Andre